Melted Ice
by ChopStickGirl120
Summary: Post WS: Bucky resents not having clearance to fight with Steve and worries for his safety. Meanwhile, his mind still falls back to the memories of the Red Room and his time as The Winter Solider. But when Steve gives him an unexpected gift, what will happen? Stucky. Rated for language.


A/N: Written for the amazing Hannah (: Enjoy!

Xxxxxxxx

"I am _not _lonely" Bucky scoffed, instinctively rolling his eyes at Natasha's accusation. It really did frustrate him that whenever Steve was out on a mission, the other Avengers thought it was their business to keep him company. That's what they called it at least. He saw it more as babysitting. He was past all the psych evaluations and all of Fury's games. And sure, he had to get a screening done once in a while, but he was as good as cleared at this point.

"James, I'm not implying that you need to be taken care of" Natasha spoke softly, observing his reaction, "I just thought leaving the apartment might do you some good."

Okay, so she had a point. Sitting in the apartment just gave him more time to worry. Now most would think that worrying over anything would be the last thing on Bucky's mind, but that was false. He spent a lot of his life fussing over Steve, even though he wouldn't admit that it was fussing. Taking care of him when he was sick, which was often, and cooking even though he wasn't great at making much of anything were some of the things he had to do on a regular basis.

But now he had to sit around and wait for days, and sometimes weeks for Steve to return from a mission that could quite possibly kill him. That's what riled him up the most. If only Bucky had clearance to fight with Steve…then he would have the satisfaction of knowing that he was alive.

"Look, I appreciate the drinks and the pep talk" He started, setting his glass of whiskey, "But I think I'm gunna head out"

Frustrated, Bucky left Natasha's apartment in a huff. He'd walked there in the first place, loving how the warm sun felt on his skin on the way there. But the sun had set a long while ago, leaving the coolness of the autumn breeze to push against his skin. Crossing his arms, he continued to walk, desperately trying to ignore the cold. He'd felt worse…much worse than this. But just a breeze or mist of cold set him back to those far too vivid memories. Just the feeling brought Bucky back to the familiar ice that he was buried in. The same ice that somehow froze his heart, making him someone he never thought he would be.

That's exactly why Steve needed to be safe. It was more than just his responsibilities as Captain America…it was more than that. Bucky needed him, in every selfish sort of way that he could fathom. Because that man was the reason his heart continued to beat. Steve Rogers managed to melt the ice.

Finally shoving his hands in his pockets, Bucky walked up the stairs carefully, knowing at this hour, the neighbors would more than likely be sleeping. He pulled out his key, unlocking the door. Upon opening it, he shrugged his jacket off and stopped in his tracks.

"—The fuck?" Bucky muttered. The room was dimly lit with candles scattered across the room. The lights created levels, almost like they were in a pattern that was supposed to be visually appealing. He watched carefully as Steve walked out of the bedroom with a lighter.

"Oh—I thought you were with Natasha" Steve stopped, quickly hiding the lighter behind his back.

"Yeah. I was." Bucky took a few steps closer, "I thought you were on a mission"

"I was. Got back early" Steve's tone was soft as he took a few steps closer as well, "This was supposed to be a surprise" He motioned to the candles and the dessert that was placed on the table.

Bucky almost grinned, "No really? I couldn't tell, Captain-lighter-behind your back"

"Very funny" Steve sighed, a small smile forming on his lips as he walked past Bucky to light the last candle.

"So, what's the occasion?" Bucky followed close behind, wrapping an arm around Steve's waist.

"Huh?" The contact took Steve by surprise, but he quickly relaxed into the touch, "Oh. Well. I haven't been around much..and I, uh..missed you"

"You missed me, eh?" Bucky pressed a kiss to Steve's shoulder, smiling into the fabric of his uniform jacket, "I missed you too, Cap"

"I was hoping you'd say something like that" Steve turned to press a kiss to the top of Bucky's head before pulling away, "Hey. I have something for you"

Bucky frowned when Steve pulled away, but his expression quickly changed when he spoke, "Really? What is it?"

"Sit down" Steve said gently, starting to walk into the bedroom.

"Is that an order, Captain?" Bucky raised an eyebrow, grinning.

"It's a suggestion" Steve called over to him.

"The bedroom? Ohhh its one of_ those_ presents" Bucky joked, getting up from his chair.

"Sit down" The Captain repeated, walking back in with something wrapped in plastic, "I've wanted to give you this for a while"

Bucky looked up at his boyfriend, confused at what he was talking about, "What is it?"

"Open it and see" Steve handed over the plastic covered present. Bucky could feel that it was some sort of fabric that was in there. Carefully, as if not to harm the content, he started to peel away what concealed the present from him. He saw the color scheme and started to rub his thumb against the fabric, remembering the texture all too well.

Bucky's dress military uniform.

…Except there was something different about it. It didn't look so bare and plain anymore. Now it was decorated with several pins and badges of honor, something he never dreamed he would have.

Breathless and silent for several minutes, Bucky finally spoke, not meeting Steve's eyes, "W-where did you get this?"

"When I was unfrozen, SHIELD gave me all of the possessions they had of mine from back in the war. It wasn't much, but it was comforting." Steve knelt down next to Bucky, "And I was your next of kin, so they kept your stuff with mine after you…" He didn't dare finish the sentence.

Bucky nodded slowly, his gaze turning up to meet Steve's, "I…why are you giving this to me?"

"Because it's yours" Steve took advantage of their eyes locking to push his lips to Bucky's lovingly, "And I wanted to wait till the right time to give it to you."

"Why is this the right time?" Bucky's hands were nearly shaking at the memories that filled him, the overwhelming nostalgia that consumed his mind…and for once in so long…

The memories weren't violent.

"I thought you might need a reminder of all that you have done for your country" Steve's voice didn't falter, "And all you have done for me"

Bucky choked back something resembling a sob, although Steve was sure he would deny it later. After a few silent moments of collecting himself, Bucky stood to his feet, pulling Steve with him, "Damn it, Rogers, you are the only one that can get me like this"

"Well that's the way it should be"

Bucky buried his face into Steve's shoulder, leaning into the man's touch, for once enjoying a comfortable silence.

"Why don't I put on some music, and you can have some of that dessert I made" Steve whispered, pressing a kiss to Bucky's forehead.

With only a moment of hesitation, Bucky pulled his head up, "I'd like that" He started, "But first, let me thank you for all you've done for me the only way I know how"

In one swift movement, Bucky pulled their lips together, kissing Steve in every anxious, needy, and forceful way that he knew how. Letting their lips collide together, Bucky took in all of the warmth Steve so willingly offered. Hands ripped through each others hair passionately, desperately…

"You…always were good at that" Steve's voice was hoarse as he whispered.

"Shut up and kiss me" Bucky pulled their lips back together.

The ice was melted.


End file.
